Love Can Come in Bottles, Too.
How can we be all those things?
Well, we believe that breastfeeding our babies is an incredible gift, but that sometimes it simply doesn't happen the way we planned.
We are not here to encourage or discourage any particular choice parents make on how to nourish their babies. We are here to support the ones who struggled or are struggling to breastfeed and are facing the guilt that often comes along with deciding to stop breastfeeding.
We have both experienced this personally, and have gone through all the guilt alone, so we wanted to start this tumblr to post encouragement and to answer your questions and concerns as you make this sometimes difficult and traumatic transition.
We want you to bottle-feed without fear of judgement, and without guilt. You are doing the best that you can do for your baby given your particular circumstances. Be assured that the love and care you take in making this sometimes agonizing decision shows beyond a shadow of a doubt that love can come in bottles, too.
Even now, almost two years later, I feel a twinge whenever I see a woman whip out her boob at the playground. Why couldn’t that have been me? I briefly fantasize about having another baby (could I maybe get it right the second time around?), before reminding myself that the dream of breastfeeding is possibly the worst reason to have another child. But then I look over at my son, roaring with laughter as he whizzes down a slide or shouting out a new word from the top of the jungle gym. My inability to breastfeed seemed so do-or-die when he was an infant, so all-determining. But I don’t think my strapping son has suffered in the long run, not even a little bit, from what I saw as such a horrendous deprivation at my hands. Breast milk or no breast milk, he couldn’t possibly have turned out any better, and these days that’s the only consolation I need.
“Breast is best.” Such a simple fact. If you are planning to be an attachment parent, you want to breastfeed. It’s at the very foundation of the philosophy.
But sometimes, things aren’t that simple. Perhaps you have a medical condition that won’t allow you to breastfeed. Maybe you are an abuse survivor who has unresolved issues that are hindering you. Or, as in my case, you and your baby have breastfeeding problems that never get fixed. You may find yourself holding a bottle for your baby, wondering how you got here, worrying that you and your baby will never truly bond because you aren’t breastfeeding.
Bottlefeeding with love is possible. It’s not the ideal situation, but you and your baby can have a loving feeding arrangement.
Who said that life is black or white? Breast or bottle? Exclusively Pumping mothers or pumping mothering are providing their baby with the best nutrition out there. It is unfair that people do not talk about this enough or that at hospitals it is not given as an option because it makes a big difference.
Everyone has their story and their reasons, the important fact is that you are working hard to give your baby the BEST. Kudos to you for all your efforts! I can tell you it is hard work to exclusively pump.
I want this site to be an open forum for everyone to share information on all topics from information on topics to questions that we can all help support each other.
